Having a plan in place for leading effective one-on-ones should be at the top of every manager’s list. are crucial to building teams where communication is open and conflict can be squashed before it arises.
“One-on-ones are one of the most important productivity tools you have as a manager,” says Elizabeth Grace Saunders, Founder of Real Life E Coaching and Training. “They are where you can ask strategic questions such as, are we focused on the right things? And from a rapport point of view, they are how you show employees that you value them and care about them.”
But leading an effective one-on-one requires a lot more than just asking questions, according to Margaret Moore, CEO of Wellcoaches Corporation. “They require cognitive agility […] You need a commitment to helping your colleague develop and grow.”
So, how can you become an effective leader in one-on-ones and help your team achieve their long-term goals? We reached out to more business leaders to find out.
Have a Schedule
Good leadership comes down to respect, so show your employees you respect them and their time with these check-ins.
“You need to have frequent one-on-one meetings with each employee. How often you schedule them will come down to the size of your team and their level of experience. They should always be on your calendar as a repeating event so everyone knows there is a standing meeting where they can make concerns or comments known,” says Lina Miranda, VP of Marketing at .
“It will probably take a little trial and error to get things started as far as scheduling goes, so give yourself some time to work out the kinks. Don’t cancel meetings last minute if you can avoid it and show up on time to show employees to show that you respect their time.”
Have an Agenda
Always if possible.
“Be clear about what you plan to discuss. Just winging it is a waste of everyone’s time. And that goes both ways. Ask the employee in question to bring a list of topics they hope to discuss if they would like to. Don’t make it mandatory; that might come off as homework and make everything more stressful on their end, but leave it as an option in case they feel so inclined to take charge,” offers Eric Elggren, Co-Founder at .
“Start by reviewing what needs to be discussed and plan the meeting around those items so that there is time to cover them all. It’s on you as the moderator to keep things on track. That being said, you can be flexible. This should feel like a casual and safe space with enough of an agenda to keep things running smoothly.”
Stop. Look. And Listen
Being fully present will go a long way in running an effective one-on-one.
“Focus on the task at hand and give the employee your full attention. This means putting the computer away or at least turning it on do not disturb. Ditto for your phone. Sending a message during these is a slap in the face to the person there and shows that you don’t care about them as much as what is popping up on your phone,” says Sumeer Kaur, CEO at .
“If there is a real emergency you are worried about missing, don’t. Someone will find you if they really need to.”
Find the Right Location
Speaking of being present, find a spot that will help foster attention.
“A lot of these one-on-ones will be casual, but treat them all as personal and serious by opting for a quiet and secluded place to chat. It might fit better in your schedule to have a meeting in the cafeteria, but it’s noisy and high traffic and others might overhear what you are discussing. Having the conversation in a private place shows the employee that you respect their privacy and assures them that everyone can speak freely about personal and professional issues,” says Umer Usman, Head of Growth at .
Celebrate Wins
Sharing a win is a good way to start a meeting and get things off on a positive note.
“Set the tone by praising the employee for something they have recently accomplished. Be sure to acknowledge and celebrate those things the employee has successfully created or implemented. Let them know you value and admire their achievements. Too often managers move to the next project or assignment without pausing to celebrate what the employee has just done. Focus on the future while praising the past,” says John Berry, CEO, and Managing Partner at .
Discuss Career Plans
Pressing issues will take precedence, but personal plans shouldn’t be neglected.
“Show your employees that you are invested in their career growth by asking career development questions. Take the time to show them that you view them as humans with future goals instead of just cogs in a corporate machine. Be curious about what interests them and set aside time to give them room for a well-considered answer. You don’t need to do it every meeting but every two or three you should ask them what they like about their role and what they want to do next. A huge percentage of employees leave their jobs for other companies due to a lack of career development. Don’t let that happen on your team,” says Drew Sherman, Director of Marketing and Communications at .
Ask Questions
Asking open-ended questions will keep the conversation flowing.
“Attach some questions to the meeting invite that will get the conversation flowing right off the bat. Skip the small talk and dig into the real topics. If you are just asking things like, ‘how is your day going?’ you are going to get stilted responses with no real substance. Asking the right questions can expose things about employees you were never privy to previously. Maybe they have been feeling overwhelmed but were keeping it to themselves. Asking a good question could get them to open up,” commented Christy Pyrz, Chief Marketing Officer at .
Take Notes
Nothing shows that you are paying attention like taking notes.
“One-on-ones can go on for an hour in some cases and a lot of topics can be covered. Something that came up, in the beginning, can quickly be forgotten by the time it’s over and you’ve moved on to your next meeting. Take notes to make sure nothing falls through the cracks. You never want to forget something that an employee asked you to do or you will risk looking like a boss who doesn’t listen to their employees. That’s going to cost you some valuable workers if you make a habit out of it,” says Dan Gray, General Manager at .
“You can also look back on old notes to see if there are any patterns in these discussions that aren’t being addressed. Review notes before each meeting to build on existing conversations.”
Be Open to Feedback
A good leader can dish it out and take it.
“The one-on-one doesn’t need to be a one-sided affair and it really shouldn’t be. Your employees probably don’t get much alone time with you unless they directly ask for it, so now is a great time to give them the chance to give you feedback. It’s an important part of running a team and being a successful manager,” says Asker A Ahmed, Director at .
“Encourage employees to speak their mind, but be prepared for them to not be wholly honest. Follow up with formal reviews they can fill out on their own time and anonymously to keep them honest. What’s important is that you let them know this is a safe space where they are free to speak their mind about anything, including you.”
Next Steps
Make sure you end your meeting with clear next steps for both you and your employee.
“Every one-on-one should end on a high note. No one should leave the meeting with their head down or spirits low. Express gratitude and thank the employee for their time and honesty. Words of affirmation are key to forming long and lasting relationships with employees. Make sure to be genuine. Reassure them that you have confidence in them and their abilities moving forward even if you just had a difficult conversation.”
“Additionally, ask them how you can support them towards what was discussed in the meeting. This will show them that you are a team and you want to help them do their best work and continue to be an asset to the team. This will go a long way to building trust with them and showing you are there to help, not criticize,” says Matt Miller, Founder, and CEO at .